Sunday, April 29, 2012

The Game

"The Game" may more commonly be known as the name of the rapper, the Michael Douglas movie, or some a book or something... Who knows. I know it mainly as one way, and all of those other versions of the game just make me lose the game I'm talking about. So what is the game? 

It's so simple in explanation that it seems hard to grasp for some. Really the only rules of the game are:
     1. Everyone is playing the game.
     2. You lose the game when you think of "the game."
     3. You must tell someone when you lose the game
(Lastly, there is a 30 minute period of grace where thinking about it doesn't cause you to embarrassingly lose again)

Oh yeah, and you cannot really win. I suppose if you die, then you're out of the game, winning in a way. Then again, you're dead and you are likely thinking of the game as that last breath passes from your lips. I kid you not; this game can drive you mad.
What I am doing is awful in a way, even though it doesn't really change anything at the same time. Everybody is playing, as mentioned before, but it's so easy to not lose if you don't know about it. But if you are reading about this, then you're odds to lose increase exponentially.

I am one of the two worst players I know. For years, up until my senior year in college, I would lose every couple of months or something. And it was usually in a really understandable way, like when someone says "Hey man did you catch the game last night," or "I'm not gonna play the game with her," and then it would hit me. Sheepishly I would say "I lost the game," and we'd be on our merry way. Oh, how it has snowballed...

Whenever somebody emphasizes the word "the," I lose. Whenever I think about thought, I lose. Whenever I have a strange train of thought, I lose. You'd be surprised how often one of those occurs in a day. So I'm losing far too often, and it's driving me crazy. 

I am a very happy person, but this has nearly become the bane of my existence. No health concerns are on my radar, I don't live a dangerous lifestyle, and I don't do drugs. A lot of the factors for dying are off the table for me. But the game might take care of that...
(Sorry for the bleakness, but man, his this thing weaseled into every corner of my brain)

Honestly, though, despite my ominousness when speaking of the game, you will probably get a kick out it for a while. Just be careful not to embrace it too quickly, it will become your worst enemy. This is my attempt at diffusing some of my loserhood to my readers. And with that, I say:

Let "The Game" Begin!

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